We cannot change what we don’t understand. Our behaviors – from what we do when we first wake up, to how we show up in our most stressful moments—demonstrate this truth. We cannot change behavior that we don’t understand.
Why do we act the way we do? How is it that some folks are able to show up to stressful situations as the best version of themselves, while others fall into reactionary behaviors? How is it that some people are better equipped to navigate tough moments in life?
By understanding and honoring your nervous system’s unique response to stress, you unlock your ability to build better habits, lead with empathy, communicate with clarity, and become an agent of transformative change in your life, in your community, and in the world.
BEHAVIOR IS INFORMED BY THE AUTONOMIC NERVOUS SYSTEM
Every way we respond to stress – both consciously and subconsciously – is informed by the autonomic nervous system. This system is carefully calibrated. It is informed by a lifetime of experience, generations of evolutionary knowledge, and our unique, individual nature.
It has been fine-tuned throughout human evolution, building a hierarchal structure that informs our individual responses to stress. It is designed to keep us safe. It is designed to keep our species safe. It is bigger than our individual choices, and yet it is a highly personalized response.
We are talking about Polyvagal Theory – the scientific concept of the relationship between the autonomic nervous system and our most fundamental needs for safety and connection. This theory, developed by Stephen Porges, outlines the relationship between our behaviors and our biology. Within Polyvagal Theory exists the concept of Autonomic Balance – that sweet spot in which both the sympathetic and the parasympathetic branches of the autonomic nervous system exert equal influence. In this state, our bodies and our brains achieve a sort of equilibrium. A person feels a sense of calm control. Their ventral vagal pathways are activated, allowing them to access both parts of their autonomic nervous system. In this state, we feel safe. In this state, our nervous systems are regulated. We’re ready. We’re in control.
But how do we get there?
FOUR PILLARS. FIVE STEPS. ENDLESS POSSIBILITIES
Too often, we find ourselves operating on auto-pilot when we encounter stress. We fall into old habits. We don’t show up as our best selves. We close ourselves off from connection. We limit our choice.
The Bocas Method recognizes and honors biology’s connection to human behavior. It creates a tangible approach to build upon the scientific work of Stephen Porges, and create actionable steps to effect real, lasting, positive change. The Bocas Method builds skills that any person can access. The four pillars of this approach will give you the tools to unlock your ability to build better habits, lead with empathy, communicate with clarity, and become an agent of transformative change in your life, in your community, and in the world.
THE FOUR PILLARS
THE DANDELION EFFECT
THE GOLDILOCKS PRINCIPLE
THE BEAUTY OF THE PAUSE
THE DANCE OF THE NERVOUS SYSTEM
It was a great experience for me to learn a new language in such a gentle way. I really needed this. I will continue learning and working with the Polyvagal Theory in my life and practice.
(Read more)zelfstandig psychosociaal therapeut met Polyvagal Theory, SSP en Past Reality Integration, https://theklavanmiddendorp.nl/
Nancy is a joy and pleasure to work with, and truly an expert in her field. I learned so much from her as I dove into Polyvagal Theory. She is kind, warm, and compassionate and teaches through an embodied approach. It is rare to find experts and consultants who embody what they teach. The time I spent learning with Nancy is some of the most valuable consultation I have received in my entire clinical career. I can’t recommend her enough. She’s the best.
(Read more)Founder, Rebecca Kase & CO – Training & Consultation, https://rebeccakase.com/
“Thank you so much for your wonderful guidance, support, teachings! I have so loved this group, training, and information. I have learned so much and have become such a better therapist and person as a result.”
(Read more)LCMFT (Licensed Clinical Marriage and Family Therapist), https://olgabloch.com/
Wow- What an amazing presentation! Thank you so very much for sharing with us your tremendous talent, wisdom, and very calming presence. We all benefited from your course and it was such a pleasure to work with you. I sure hope our paths cross again! Thank you so very much.
(Read more)Licensed Clinical Psychologist, ICP+P Short Course Co-Coordinator, http://www.drmaryamyslinski.com
Nancy is an artful trainer. She presents material with clarity, depth, and heart, all while feeling completely natural and relatable. Her presentations are like sitting across from a wise and knowledgeable friend at a coffee shop, such that learning becomes an easeful and connected experience rather than the hard work of the cognitive mind.
(Read more)Having consulted with Nancy previously, I knew instantly that she was the person to contact when challenged with my latest training project. I am an accomplished professional, PhD, recognized in my field of trauma resolution. A Broadway producer and director invited me to work with their cast. It was the first time since the beginning of Covid that this theater group would assemble in person and there was a sense that actors reading their parts in a play about trauma would experience intense feelings and triggers. My job would be to help the cast notice activation and have strategies to return to regulation. I gladly accepted the invitation, confident that I had techniques and tools to offer; HOWEVER, I found, as soon as I attempted to organize my thoughts and work out a plan… I went spiraling into an outer orbit-that’s how it felt. I was disorganized, in a frenzy….
(Read more)Nancy Rubbico is a great clinician and gifted teacher to her students. Nancy was part of our International Team of consultants during the Live-Online 5 month event held for Deb Dana’s Training Spain in 2020. She has clarity and she is well organized to support any project she decides to put her heart on. I fully endorse her for all types of clinical and educational projects where human felt-sense of safety is required.
(Read more)Nancy is a skilled clinician and polyvagal trained therapist. I had the pleasure of her teaching and guidance in my Foundational Polyvagal training and wanted to learn more. I joined her Polyvagal consultation group which I found to be a helpful next step in integrating PVT, and the understanding of the nervous system in case presentations. She offered not just theoretical but practical knowledge and interventions I was able to apply in my sessions. I have learned a great deal in how to map and regulate my own nervous system as well as helping my clients to do the same.
(Read more)Nancy’s vitality and ready sense of humor make it easy to listen to and interact with her on a course. My initial experience of Nancy was working as a consultant on a course on which Nancy was a Lead Trainer. Her ability to share information in interesting ways paired well with her capacity to be fully present and really listen to participants. She responded thoughtfully to each comment or question and was able to connect on a deep level. I greatly appreciated her clear teaching and varied examples of helpful resources. For me, Nancy stands out as a trainer in that she is able to create sessions that are directly applicable, informative and fun.
(Read more)Nancy is a skilled and attuned Trainer. While acting as a Consultant on “Foundations 1-Polyvagal Theory Training”, I noted that Nancy takes a collaborative approach to program design, and honors the pacing and needs of the group. Knowing when to make space for discussion, breakout rooms and breaks is key to delivering memorable content. Nancy’s enthusiastic facilitation style keeps participants interested, ensures that they are heard, and inspires deeper contemplation. Plus, she makes things fun and playful. I love working with Nancy, and would love to do so again!
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